Mr. Wu

Masquerading for some considerable time as a history-loving study hall tyrant with pictures of presidents adorning his walls, Mr Wu was living a lie.

The illustrious teacher of such mentally taxing classes as study hall and homeroom, Mr. Wu kicked it old school. He believed in confiscating cell phones, forcing teenagers to communicate via soup cans, and jabbing out the eyes of anybody who pissed him off. Oh, wait, that's Old Testament.

But beneath that stern exterior was something very different. Something that called out to student Peter Ferrer, who confessed his love for Mr. Wu at Possibilities, the local gay bar. Something that made him create a trophy for the winner of his Egg Drop Competition. Something that made him dance in class at the thought of his GPA-killing final exam.

For Mr. Wu, in truth, was...a physics teacher.

Well, whatever. Wu woos us all (but especially Dick) with his dispassionate humor, which has gotta count for a lot. W00t!