Who's Who of Veronica Mars — D
- D'Amato, Deputy Leo
- D'Amato, Tina
Leo's little sister. A charming ten-year-old who suffers her peers' bullying tendencies because of her Down Syndrome, Tina causes Leo to do something very unfortunate. Well, at least now she will see him at home much more often. Leo sacrifices his career and jeopardizes Aaron's pending trial to get Tina into private school in 2.10 "One Angry Veronica."
-grimsqueaker- D. Etler
- See Etler, D.
- Daddy Warbucks
- See Warbucks, Daddy
- Dahl, Angie
Neptune High 09er. What a doll. She smirks, she sashays, and she pays off doctors to diagnose her with Generalized Anxiety Disorder. She's Veronica's closest competitor in the race for the Kane scholarship, and her expensive Semester at Sea edges her GPA slightly ahead of Veronica's. Go ahead — hate her. Everyone else does. Wallace and Logan try to beat her in a physics competition, but it's her own unpreparedness for an English exam, on Crime and Punishment, no less, that just might take her down. But it isn't quite enough, as Veronica is still hoping Angie will bomb a final or two come 2.21 "Happy Go Lucky." Angie celebrates her acceptance to Stanford but begrudges Veronica's in 2.18 "I Am God," and Veronica wishes failure on Angie in 2.21 "Happy Go Lucky."
-funky-donut, topanga
All bios: 2.21 2.18
Played by Kayla Ewell.- Daily, Deborah
Neptune socialite with fake boobs (according to Monica Hadwin). Sex with Aaron Echolls and pumpkins were on the menu at the Casablancas Halloween party. Such was the information Keith collects in 1.10 "An Echolls Family Christmas."
-Inigo
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- Daisy #2
A supercomputer named after a flower. Or perhaps the Duke brothers' cousin. You know them Duke brothers...always getting into trouble involving a giant supercomputer and a bunch of fake Hearst IDs. Okay, not really. I doubt they would even know what a "computer" is, but Professor Winkler and Leon sure do in 3.19 "Weevils Wobble But They Don't Go Down."
-alliterator- Dakota
No, not that little girl who was in War of the Worlds with this guy, but rather a boy Little Leaguer whom Woody Goodman coaches. He's stepping in too much in 2.02 "Driver Ed."
-alliterator- Dale R.
- See R., Dale
- Dalton, Mr.
Neptune High autoshop teacher. Who is this mysterious man who allows all of the students in his class keys to the room? Does he realize that the class itself seems to be full of hoodlums and hooligans, just like a million fictional shop classes before it? Perhaps he is an accomplice to their machinations, assisting people like the PCHers in their car boosting! PERHAPS, that's the point of the entire class: to teach people how to steal cars! And that wiley old coot takes a percentage off the top! And maybe he's in bed with the Fitzpatricks to boot! And MAYBE HE KILLED FELIX!1! Or...maybe he's just apathetic and never feels like locking up his own classroom. Whatever. In any case, his room and tools are used for shenanigans in 2.13 "Ain't No Magic Mountain High Enough."
-public displays of lust- Damon, Johnny
Current member of the Boston Red Sox and Veronica's favorite baseball player. His career stats are 130 HR, 1,788 hits, 700 RBI, .290 batting average, .352 OBP, .432 SGL...*snore* Oh, sorry. I'm really not much of a baseball fan. But like Veronica said in 2.01 "Normal Is the Watchword", Johnny is so pretty. Oh, so very pretty.
-wyk- Dan
Mechanic at the Symbolic Motor Car Company. He doesn't know the name Veronica Mars, he wouldn't repair her car if she wanted him to, and he didn't really care for his colleague Curly all that much. One might almost think his service lacks something, if it weren't for a little clue Veronica discovers. Dan isn't very lively or friendly, but at least somewhat helpful in 2.03 "Cheatty Cheatty Bang Bang."
-grimsqueaker
Played by John Ciccolini.- Dan #2
A fratboy on the Pi Sigma scoreboard. A simple name for what we presume is a simple kind of guy. He managed to score 200 points for his recent escapade, so the tried-and-true pick-up line, "Come here much?" must still work. We assume so in 2.16 "The Rapes of Graff."
-topanga- Dan Etheridge
- See Etheridge, Dan
- Dance Team Advisor
The leader-apparent of the Pep Squad car wash encourages Veronica and Lilly to talk less and scrub more. Perhaps if Lilly had talked more, there would have been less of her to be scrubbed up from the Kane swimming pool. Gross, but true. Ms. Stay-Focused silences the girls in 1.01 "Pilot."
-topanga
Played by Nicole Monica.- Daniel Boone
- See Boone, Daniel
- Daniella
Taut blonde in Taut Blonde. Or perhaps she's a taught blonde, which would be an oxymoron in most states. Unless she's truly not blonde in 1.18 "Weapons of Class Destruction."
-Polter-Cow- Danielle
Party girl with taste. Like pretty much all of the female guests at the alterna-prom, Danielle isn't too keen to get close to Dick's, erm, hog. Applaud her on her good sense in 2.20 "Look Who's Stalking."
-grimsqueaker- Danielle Marcos
- See Marcos, Danielle
- Daniels, Mrs.
Wife of Tom. She ain't giving it up at home, which explains why her husband is so testy. So quips Logan in 1.07 "The Girl Next Door."
-Inigo
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- Danner, Rick
Actor. We'll never know if Rick would have made a passable Tom Cruz. His photo gets short shrift in 1.15 "Ruskie Business."
-Inigo- Danny Boyd
- Danny Cleaver
- See Cleaver, Danny
- Danny Mo
- See Mo, Danny
- Danny Rossow
- See Rossow, Danny
- Dante
Friend of Weevil. Probably a member of the PCH bikers and thus living on the wrong side of Neptune, Dante certainly knows inferno better than paradise. Weevil has got his number in 2.04 "Green-Eyed Monster."
-grimsqueaker- Daphne
The pretty Scooby-Doo character who isn't Fred. Veronica aspires to be her in 1.05 "You Think You Know Somebody."
-Inigo- Daphne #2
An escort's pseudonym. Was Sugar Jones trying to summon up images of a young redheaded mystery-solver when she gave this name to Cliff? Perhaps aware of a secret passion of Cliff's for girl detec- No, wait. That line of thought is a little disconcerting. Forget I mentioned it. In any case, Daphne is not someone's actual name in 2.16 "The Rapes of Graff."
-public displays of lust- Darcy
Casey Gant's ex-girlfriend. She reckons she was dumped so Casey could schtup a teacher in 1.09 "Drinking the Kool-Aid."
-Inigo
Played by Courtnee Draper.- Daria Morgendorffer
- See Morgendorffer, Daria
- Darius "Dime Bag" Bagley
- See Bagley, Darius "Dime Bag"
- Darla
A member of PHAT and activist against Ed Argent and his bow-hunting lifestyle. She nearly tricks Veronica and Mac into shedding their clothes for the cause, but it's all an April Fool's joke (in January). We wonder if her last name is Morgendorffer in 3.10 "Show Me the Monkey."
-alliterator
Played by Adriana DeMeo.- Darline, Delores
Works in the administration office at Neptune High School. Would you believe the service? Neptune High isn't just there to educate. It sidelines as a post office. This is a lucky thing for Justin Smith. Delores's delivery of his mail stops him being pummelled by an angry Veronica Mars in 1.03 "Meet John Smith."
-Inigo
Played by Darline Ann Harris.- Darrell Fennel
- Darren Hartman
- See Hartman, Darren
- Daryl Oates
- See Oates, Daryl
- Dr. Dave
Grief counselor. Veronica spent an hour every Thursday for six weeks staring at him across the ottoman. He's downtown. She was sent to him so she could forget all her worries, forget all her cares. But the lights were no brighter for her there. She'd have been better off if she'd listened to the music of the traffic of the city. Veronica lingers on the sidewalk where the neon lights are pretty in 1.09 "Drinking the Kool-Aid."
-Inigo- Dave
Jackie's date. Is this handsome young man just an old friend to Jackie, or possibly more? Veronica has her suspicions in 2.03 "Cheatty Cheatty Bang Bang", but Jackie feels comfortable enough to mention him to Wallace in 2.05 "Blast from the Past."
-grimsqueaker- Dave Chappelle
- See Chappelle, Dave
- Dave Gibbons
- See Gibbons, Dave
- Dave Starsky
- See Starsky, Dave
- Davenport, Mr.
Name found on Dr. Griffith's caller ID. We knew he was in with the Fitzpatricks, but he's also got a connection to someone named Davenport? That's a mighty British-sounding name. Maybe he's trying to take over England! The Scottish and Welsh better watch their backs. Of course, this man could be of the Boston Davenports, soundly destroying our theory. Either way, Tom's got his number in 2.14 "Versatile Toppings."
-Polter-Cow- David
Character in Lost in the Midst played by Jimmy Spain. We can't tell you anything about the character. We can't tell you anything about the play. Maybe they don't exist. Maybe Jimmy's credits are a lot like Jimmy. Not real. At least he had the wherewithal to give himself the lead in 1.04 "The Wrath of Con."
-Inigo- David Caruso
- See Caruso, David
- David Hasselhoff
- See Hasselhoff, David
- David Jackson
- See Jackson, David
- David "Curly" Moran
- David White
- See White, David
- Professor David Winkler
- Davidson, Stanley
Castle member, class of 1933. Back in aught three, William Harley and Arthur Davidson got together and made their first motorcycle in Milwaukee. Thirty years later, Arthur tearfully watched his youngest son receive a degree in English Literature from the fancy West Coast school his darling wife insisted they send little Stan to. Watching his bespectacled, tweedy son mugging for the cameras was like a knife in the heart for the elder Davidson. Stan made it up to Daddy Davidson, though, because in 1942, he was the first and only Nobel Prize winner to ride a Hog into the award ceremony. No matter how tear-jerking this fairy tale, though, Stan's still hiding something in his file in 3.20 "The Bitch Is Back."
-starxdsparrow- Davis, Mr.
Claire's wimp of a lawyer. He doesn't say much. He doesn't do much. He just sits in Dean O'Dell's office, cowering in his chair and being all...bald. And bland. And not saying a whole lot to defend Claire. What a waste of money, girl. She'd be better off paying 20 bucks an hour for someone who can actually talk, and kick this lousy litigator to the curb in 3.06 "Hi, Infidelity."
-fulfilled
Played by Simon Anthony.- Davis,
Name on the whiteboard in the interrogation room at the Neptune Sheriff's Department. The likelihood is that this is a list of assignments and that Davis is thus a deputy. Poor Davis, s/he has no partner. Wonder why? B.O. problem? Donut hogger? Not to fret: Deputy Sacks is in need of a new BFF, so maybe Sacks and Davis can team up. And hey, maybe they can get matching mustaches! ...What do you mean, Davis might be a woman? That would make the matching mustaches even better in 3.15 "Papa's Cabin."
-wyk- Davis, Jeremy
The writer of such important newspaper articles as "SDSU Cornerback Goes in Second Round." With all the juicy things that Lloyd Blankenship is writing about, surely this guy could write something with a bit more pizzazz in 2.10 "One Angry Veronica."
-alliterator- Daw, David
One of many links in the trail of Aaron's Kidz money. Given his alliterative name, he probably chose a life as a superhero, perhaps calling himself The Daw, a master thief who only steals from other thieves! No one suspects him, however, because of his link to Askwith International, which campaigns to save critically acclaimed but underwatched television shows. We think. The Daw steals a few microseconds of screen time in 3.04 "Charlie Don't Surf."
-Polter-Cow- Dawg, Deputy
A cartoon dog that was a deputy sheriff, his humor was mainly based on comical accents and Southern stereotypes. Much like Larry the Cable Guy. Veronica mistakenly compares Logan to Dawg, when a more fitting name would be Heckle and Jeckle in 2.17 "Plan B."
-alliterator- Dawn
- Dawn #2
Hearst College student and victim of rape. What better way to wake up the morning after a party than with roofies in your system and all your hair shaved off? Probably only ranks behind finding out a month later that the guy who did it to you is not only still running around free, but is making his habit a serial one. Dawn and Stacy have a nasty reason to bond in 2.16 "The Rapes of Graff."
-marksoflove
Played by Cristina Balmores.- Dawn Lamb
- See Lamb, Dawn
- Day, Bunny
Member of Boatloads of Fun Corp. Bunny Day. Hee, hee. I love the names that Rob comes up for all the 09er parents in 2.01 "Normal Is the Watchword."
-wyk- Day, Jimmy
Neptune High student. We don't learn much about Neptune High's quarterback, except that he smokes pot, and that his 09er parents like to bend rules to keep him on the football team. But thinking about it, that is probably all we need to know about this no-good, rich boy character in 2.01 "Normal Is the Watchword."
-grimsqueaker- Day Laborer #2
Like his colleague and partner in not-so-serious crime, Spaniel Man, he displays an impressive pantomime talent when describing the dognapper's van to Veronica Mars — maybe a little too impressive, given that she is led to believe that Hans rides a white horse and likes to spank busty women in 1.19 "Hot Dogs."
-grimsqueaker
Played by Arturo Medina.- Day, Walt
Member of Boatloads of Fun Corp. Due to a slight clerical error at the lab, his pot-smoking son somehow managed to pass a mandatory drug test. Golly, it's so hard to find good help these days. Luckily, it's really easy to buy crooked lab techs in 2.01 "Normal Is the Watchword."
-wyk
Played by Mark Gadbois.- De Lorean, John
Automotive impresario. He changed the face of the early eighties, and also the Future, with a sports car whose doors opened from the roof. It's not his innovation in car design, though, that causes Weevil to namecheck him; he was accused and later acquitted of drug trafficking. Weevs feels his pain in 2.08 "Ahoy, Mateys!"
-marksoflove- Dean Enbom
- See Enbom, Dean
- Dean Rudolph
- See Rudolph, Dean
- Debbie S. Bankhead
- See Bankhead, Debbie S.
- Debbie Meyer
- See Meyer, Debbie
- Deborah "Cheyenne" Collins
- Mrs. Deborah Philipina Hauser
- Debra Villareal
- See Villareal, Debra
- Decker, Constable
A member of the Castle. The eldest of five, Constable hails from Minnesota where his excessively law-abiding parents raise his siblings Superintendent, Chief Inspector, Hauptkommissar and Meter Maid. With names like these, who needs secrets? Needless to say we'd rather not know his in 3.20 "The Bitch Is Back."
-grimsqueaker- Declan
Member of the Fighting Fitzpatricks. This wannabe boxer practices his punching technique on the runt of the PCHers. Usually we would tell a big, mean bully such as Declan to pick on someone his own size, but considering the vertically-challenged, gym-adverse physique of some the PCHers, it might not be possible for the totally buff Declan to find a worthy adversary in 2.19 "Nevermind the Buttocks."
-wyk- Dedee Pfeiffer
- See Pfeiffer, Dedee
- Dedlos, George
Wanted for something. He's on a poster in the interrogation room. He could be a Carlos. Or a Shields. Or a Trelawney. Or a Biggerstaff. Hey, directors? When Rick goes to the trouble of making such pretty graphics for you, can you please just get us close enough to read them properly? George grins out from his poster, although sadly, he does not move about like Sirius Black, in 2.11 "Donut Run."
-Inigo- DeeDee
Hearst student. We know she can measure time since she knows how long it takes for eight seconds to go by. Maybe, however, she rides bulls in her spare time, so that particular unit of time is quite noticeable. And as Dick learns, when you mess with the bullrider, you'll get the horns...of her boyfriend 3.01 "Welcome Wagon."
-Polter-Cow
Played by Mandy Gill.- Deep Throat
Washington Post informant who helped to break the Watergate story. Or a film starring Linda Lovelace about, uh, about...family-friendly site, family-friendly site. The ambiguity as to which D.T. Veronica is referring made Weevil blush in 1.14 "Mars vs. Mars."
-Inigo- DeGeneres, Ellen
Comedienne, actress, talk show host, writer. Logan is quite fond of her show. We wonder if he saw the episode where the guest looked an awful lot like Veronica. Ellen danced quite a bit in that one, and Logan probably danced along with her. But there will be no more dancing following the events of 2.06 "Rat Saw God."
-Polter-Cow- Delgado, Fern
- Delmont, Dr.
Sarah Williams's doctor. Thank God medical confidentiality is not best preserved by the clinic, otherwise that lame storyline would have dragged on even longer in 1.07 "The Girl Next Door."
-wyk- DeLongpre, Amelia
Abel Koontz's daughter. Bugging Wiedman's office, Veronica discovers that Koontz has an heir. Hoping to obtain evidence that the Kanes paid off Koontz, Veronica misleads Amelia, only for that action to come back and bite her in the ass. Accepting Wiedman's handsome bribe gains Amelia some raving times in Europe, a short stay in a seedy hotel, and a freezing end in an ice machine. Was her new boyfriend, diplomat's son Carlos Mercado, her undoing? Fate is cruel to Abel's child: Amelia is mentioned in 1.16 "Betty and Veronica," succumbs to greed in 1.17 "Kanes and Abel's," and pays dearly in 2.06 "Rat Saw God."
-Inigo, grimsqueaker
All bios: 2.06 1.17 1.16
Played by Erin Chambers.- DeMouy, Renny
Neptune High's part-time IT guy. He has that certain je ne sais quoi that makes Veronica do a double take. But is there a crime passionale in his memory bank? We find out in 1.08 "Like a Virgin."
-Inigo
Played by Robert DoBrev.- Denenberg, Stephanie
Hannah Griffith's mom and Dr Griffith's ex-wife. She brandishes her maiden name at Logan like a Nazi Feminist on crack and then shows off her mad parenting skills by telling Hannah the only thing Logan wants from her is sex. Oh, Steph, if only you knew what your interference would lead Hannah to offer in 2.15 "The Quick and the Wed."
-fickledame
Played by Stacy Edwards.- Denney, Jessica
Email correspondent of Woody Goodman. Who is Jessica Denney? Does her son play soccer with Woody's son? Or is she another one of Woody's alleged "campaign staffers"? Or better yet, perhaps she is just the latest example of a Rickout in 2.21 "Happy Go Lucky." (Rickout - Rick Pickett shoutout)
-wyk- Dennis Kirkpatrick
- See Kirkpatrick, Dennis
- Dennis, Douglas
Member of the Castle. During college, Douglas thought briefly of a career as a caped crusader named The Alliterator, but then gave up the thought in favour of becoming yet another billionaire living off his family's vast income and slowly drinking himself into oblivion. Maybe it was the lack of murdered parents? Douglas's life is hidden in Jake Kane's files in 3.20 "The Bitch Is Back."
-grimsqueaker- Dent, Mallory
- Denton, Mrs.
Either the teacher in charge of Neptune Navigator TV or a potter. We lean towards the former. Pam thinks Mrs. Denton should fire Lars for making careless slips about porcelain-skin Meg's reputation. Do you get the puns or are your eyes glazing over? Potter. Fire. Slip. Porcelain. Glaze. Yes? No? Oh well, Mrs. Denton's name is wheeled about in 1.08 "Like a Virgin."
-Inigo, wyk- DePaul, Francois
Journalist. He wrote the story headlined "Test result errors rampant in SATs, effect immense," which is...interesting. Is there anyone in Neptune who is honest enough or capable enough to give accurate test results? What with drug test results being manufactured for Boatloads of Fun Corporation, purchasable doctor's notes diagnosing generalized anxiety disorder, maybe even false findings of chlamydia, Neptune's record with accurate test results continues to be really, really dodgy in 2.21 "Happy Go Lucky."
-Inigo- Depriest, Steven
-
Castle member, class of 1930. In 1929, Steven visited Fantasy Island. For his fifty grand, he hunted white rhinoceroses and bald eagles while riding a polar bear. His file basically says that he's a mean-spirited jerk, but at least we didn't have to hear Tattoo yell, "Depriest, Boss! Depriest!" in 3.20 "The Bitch Is Back."
-starxdsparrow - Deputy
Man of the city. One of the countless hot cops of Balboa County, he makes Veronica and Duncan's ride back to Neptune a little more exciting in 1.02 "Credit Where Credit's Due."
-grimsqueaker
Played by Zadran Wali.- Deputy #2
Does the sheriff's bidding in Kretchmer County. He must be bucking for his boss's job, or just desperate to please, to work hard enough to find the few spots of blood left in the death cabin of Kendall Casablancas. However, any points scored for observation are lost in his failure to recognize a Vincent Van Gogh in 3.02 "My Big Fat Greek Rush Week."
-Inigo
Played by Norman Black.- Derek Applegate
- See Applegate, Derek
- Derrick Karr
- See Karr, Derrick
- Derrick's Brother
Brother of Derrick Karr. He was injured in Iraq and can thus no longer use his legs. Though this instilled a sense of hatred for Arabs in his brother, Big Bro seems to have no enmity for them. His brother, however, has enmity enough for the both of them in 3.16 "Un-American Graffiti."
-alliterator
Played by Eric Ladin.- Derryberry, Darryl
Colleague of Marvin Chase, who inherits a job and a grabby co-worker from him. Of all the felt he ever felt, he never felt a piece of felt which felt as fine as that felt felt, when first he felt that felt hat's felt. Say that three times fast while watching 3.04 "Charlie Don't Surf."
-grimsqueaker- Dershowitz, Alan
Famous lawyer. His clients have included Klaus von Bulow and O.J. Simpson. So what does Abel Koontz have against him? He is no Cliff McCormack, that's what. Dershowitz gets a shout-out in 1.08 "Like a Virgin."
-Inigo- Desante, Domonick
Sender of Veronica's naughty video to Chip Diller. When Veronica found him, the pubescent snicker-er gloated over our girl's all-too-recent exhibitions, but one cancelled credit card and four missing tires later, Domonick finally listened to reason — or at least to Veronica's sizzling Taser. Domonick Desante swears off Daniel Powter — and dirty mpegs — in 3.20 "The Bitch Is Back."
-Alex
Played by Joaquin Perez Campbell.- Desk Clerk
Works reception at the Neptune Grand. When Veronica arrives all aflutter, she won't give up Mac's room number or ignore the "Do Not Disturb" instruction. She needs to go back to hotel management school as she was unable to recognize that Beaver was clearly a psycho. The desk clerk proves to be just as fallible as most of the Season Two audience in 2.22 "Not Pictured."
-Inigo
All bios: 2.22 2.22
Played by Rebecca Rhae Larsen.- Desk Manager
A smarmy (we think) desk manager at a sweet (or should that be "suite"?) hotel where Veronica and Logan thought Lynn might be holing up. Called Jeeves by Logan, this clerk fails spectacularly to look anything like Stephen Fry in 1.15 "Ruskie Business."
-alliterator
Played by Paul D. Roberts.- Desmond Fellows
- See Fellows, Desmond
- Detailer
A man who loves to clean cars. But maybe he doesn't. Maybe he goes to bed dreading having to go to work in the morning and then wakes up feeling like there'd be nothing worse than having to clean one more single solitary car. And then maybe he goes to work and hates his entire day and can't wait to leave, but then he gets home and starts dreading work again...or maybe we're projecting just a little bit. The Detailer probably has a Magic Touch for cleaning cars for really rich men in 2.15 "The Quick and the Wed."
-funky-donut
Played by Gary Weeks.- Detroit Cobras
Rock band...from Detroit! They combine garage, rock, and soul and breathe new life into standards from the '50s and '60s. Primarily a cover band, they have one original song called "Hot Dog (Watch Me Eat)." We would actually like to see a cobra eat a hot dog. Why isn't that on YouTube? All we have is a DC poster on the wall of KRFF in 3.17 "Debasement Tapes."
-Polter-Cow- Devil Dave
Serial killer or acoustic guitar nerd? Look at him! Can there be any question? He strums in 1.11 "Silence of the Lamb."
-Inigo- Devlin, Miss
A Veronica alias. What do you get when you cross Japanime, a Catholic school outfit, and Veronica Mars? Every fanboy's dream come true. (Hey, you over-18-year-old fans! Veronica is only 17!) Dressed as Sailor Moon and playing games as Gamegirl, she takes on yet another persona to steal Grant Winters's ID at the gaming club in 1.04 "The Wrath of Con."
-Inigo, wyk- Dewey, Melvil
Inventor of the Dewey Decimal System, not the infamous "Dewey Defeats Truman" Dewey. He apparently liked to catalog things (in fact, he even invented the Americanized version of the word "catalog") and is a member of the American Library Association's Hall of Fame. Who knew? Probably not Logan, though he laments the lack of Dewey's system in the library in 3.14 "Mars, Bars."
-alliterator- Dex
Karaoke singer. Granted, his vocal art is more enthusiastic than awe inspiring, but rating him a meager "two" seems a little unfair in 1.12 "Clash of the Tritons."
-grimsqueaker
Played by Josh Temple.- Diamond Smugglers Lead Singer
Lead singer of the Diamond Smugglers, a famous Neil Diamond cover band. His real name is Steve McCarthy. The Diamond Smugglers play at the Pi Sigs' frat party, covering such Diamond hits as "Sweet Caroline" and "Thank the Lord for the Night Time." He also introduces Club Flush, setting off alarm bells in Sweet Veronica's head. Steve loves him some Diamond in 3.09 "Spit & Eggs."
-funky-donut
Played by Steve McCarthy.- Diamond Smugglers Singer
Diamond Smugglette. This pink-haired ingenue vamps her way through a concert at the Pi Sigs' frat party, singing her heart out to Neil Diamond classics. Along with the lead singer and the other chick, this Smugglette rocks the house in 3.09 "Spit & Eggs."
-funky-donut
Played by Brandy Ernst.- Diamond Smugglers Singer #2
Diamond Smugglette. This blonde-haired singer backs up the most Neil-Diamond-lovingest man to ever love Neil Diamond at the Pi Sigs' frat party. This Smugglette sings yesterday's songs in 3.09 "Spit & Eggs."
-funky-donut
Played by Julie Lowery.- Diane Ruggiero
- See Ruggiero, Diane
- DiCintio, Nick
Insurance agent for Regency Life Insurance. Being grave and somber must be a full time job for someone who has to hand out fat checks to widows all day long. Nick's obviously one of the best in the business as he manages both in the face of Mindy's
obvious cleavagestate of bereavement. He unwittingly funds a trip to Cabo in a shiny new boat in 3.15 "Papa's Cabin."-starxdsparrow
Played by Wayne Thomas Yorke.- Dicintio, Tom
Is he a Vegas cop or P.I.? We're not sure. The only thing we're sure of is that without his help, Keith could have never tracked down Ben and Yolanda. Tom, thanks for bringing an end to that boring storyline in 1.13 "Lord of the Bling."
-wyk- Dick Casablancas
- Dick Cheney
- See Cheney, Dick
- Dick Tracy
- See Tracy, Dick
- Dickinson, Emily
American poet who lived in seclusion and gained popularity only after her death. Perhaps it is no surprise to see her name up in Mrs. Murphy's English class when Blake is being studied. An early critic accused her work of being tinged with Blake's mysticism. However, her unusual style found favor with the masses who rejected the critic's charge that she "with impunity set at defiance the laws of gravitation and grammar." See, MI.net grammar Nazis? It's not just about punctuation. In any event, that critic was dead before the greatest discovery was made about her work. Every poem can be sung to the tune of the theme to Gilligan's Island. That's some genius on display in 2.16 "The Rapes of Graff."
-Inigo- Didden,
No, not an English electronic pop singer's acolyte, but Kevin Carney's Algebra II teacher. We bet he/she can do some basic math: 0 lines + 0 appearances + 2 seconds of his/her name on-screen = very, very, very minor character. Does Wallace work out the math in 1.06 "Return of the Kane"?
-alliterator- Diddings,
There once were some people called Diddings.
In life they had only the best things.
They built for their doom
A bloody great tomb
To hold the remains of what death brings.
The tomb appears in 1.09 "Drinking the Kool-Aid."-Inigo- Diddon, Hank
Homecoming King nominee. Not the Triton initiate, Hank has to find other means to make himself known in the raging shark pool that is Neptune High School society. Will becoming Homecoming King make him even more popular? Does he stand a chance against Duncan Kane? Whatever the answers are, we don't find out in 2.05 "Blast from the Past."
-grimsqueaker- Diddon, Harry
One of the six guys you'd pretty much expect to be invited to join the Tritons, according to Rick. Whether Harry actually is invited to join the secret society that represents the best in academics and sports, we will never know. Rick doesn't know what he is talking about and the Great Triton will never tell 'cause, like, it's secret, right? The
masonsTritons appear in 1.12 "Clash of the Tritons."-Inigo- Diefenbach,
Teacher who's in charge of Kevin Carney's gym class. Is this the Coach? All we know is what Wallace finds out in 1.06 "Return of the Kane."
-marksoflove- Dietrich, Marlene
Actress and generally quite a phenomenon. The fact that a poster showing her, or at least a look-alike named "Marlena," hangs in Sully's and Glen's dorm room among half-naked hotties gives us a tiny spark of hope as for these young men's taste, small and meager as it might be. The Dietrich illuminates even the humblest halls in 3.07 "Of Vice and Men."
-grimsqueaker- Diller, Chip
- Dillon, Matt
The law in Dodge. Gunsmoke was the radio and TV "story of the violence that moved west with young America, and the story of a man who moved with it." As he would say, "I'm that man, Matt Dillon, United States Marshal — the first man they look for and the last they want to meet. It's a chancy job, and it makes a man watchful...and a little lonely." After a successful radio series, the TV show ran and ran and ran and ran, becoming the longest-running scripted show ever. For Desmond Fellows, he is the greatest sheriff in history. He's right. Marshal. Sheriff. What's the dif, Keith? Shame on you for spitting blood and splitting hairs in 3.17 "Debasement Tapes."
-Inigo- Dime's Flunky
A follower, hanger-on, myrmidon, right-hand man, lackey, serf, barnacle, bootlicker, sycophant, minion, slave. Basically Dime's girl Friday, but without all that sexual tension. We think. But he's a pretty funky flunky in 1.13 "Lord of the Bling."
-alliterator
Played by Ray Auxais.- Dirk, James
Aaron's co-star in the 1982 thriller, The Long Haul. That film featured a truck going over a bridge. Did appearing in Aaron's film debut send his career the same way? Movie posters don't tell in 2.03 "Cheatty Cheatty Bang Bang."
-Inigo- Dirty Sanchez
- See Sanchez, Dirty
- Disney, Walt
Um. Uh. Oh, you know. Him of the dalmatians and the talking mice and the theme parks. His Aladdin on Ice, a mind-boggling concept for a story that takes place in the desert, is in Omaha or Europe, depending on how good Veronica's geography is, in 1.17 "Kanes and Abel's." But we're still trying to find the one about the wicked stepmother trying to bump off her rich husband's spawn Veronica mentions in 2.19 "Nevermind the Buttocks."
-Inigo
All bios: 2.19 1.17- Distraught Woman
When her daughter goes missing, this mother vows to hold the entire sheriff's department responsible if she isn't found. Does that include Inga? Mama holds back tears in 1.11 "Silence of the Lamb."
-topanga
Played by Deanna Driscoll.- District Attorney
Neptune's prosecutor to Cliff's Perry Mason. Needless to say, things didn't go well in the career-making bikers' trial. We wondered if he still had a job as he had not been seen since 1.01 "Pilot" but he, or his successor, was around to drop the Toombs murder case against Logan in 2.01 "Normal Is the Watchword."
-Inigo
All bios: 2.01 1.01
Played by Kirk Fogg.- DJ Hellfish
Hearst College Radio host. What is it with DJs and seafood-themed names on this show? We had a pirate inspired by a cereal, a substitute crustacean and now this dude, who probably thought his "clever" pun makes him seem "cool" or something. Some news, kid, it's not the name: begging people not to change the frequency when you've just started is a rather huge clue that it won't get good. Hellfish gets turned off in 3.07 "Of Vice and Men."
-grimsqueaker- Django
Moon Calf Collective chef. His secret ingredient is love. Aww or eww, depending on your mileage. He smiles, he cooks, and he smiles some more in 1.09 "Drinking the Kool-Aid."
-Inigo
Played by Farhang Pernoon.- Doctor
We would make the obvious joke about friendly, enigmatic doctors without names here, but really, how many references to obscure cult shows can you squeeze into one Who's Who? He could be a little more sonic — or at least wear a scarf — in 1.22 "Leave It to Beaver."
-marksoflove
Played by Bod Arnold.- Doctor #2
Email buddy of Veronica. Doctor who? Does he travel through time and space in a blue police box? How's he with sonic technology? Does he favor fluffy scarves or leather jackets? And what's he so happy about that causes him to email Veronica with a happy face for a subject line? The mysteries are almost overwhelming in 2.08 "Ahoy, Mateys!"
-marksoflove- Doddie
PCH biker with an unusual name. Is he doddering? Is he dotty? Does he doddle? Does he doodle? De... I mean, we don't discover in 2.08 "Ahoy, Mateys!"
-alliterator- Doe, Jane
The anonymous partner of John Q. Doe. Or possibly what Trina was called after she was found in the WC of NHS during PN. I bet she's just glad her last name isn't Moorehead in 2.09 "My Mother, the Fiend."
-alliterator- Doe, John Q.
Fictional fiction. Cassidy thinks that Mr. Doe would trust the newest Casablancas real estate venture with his money; Mr. Doe has perhaps not been keeping up with the news. Then again, who wouldn't trust the Beav? Aww, look at those sorrowful, deep eyes. Sigh, and his adorably scruffy hair. Ooo, and that fetchingly shiny letterhead. Oh, Beaver. The recipient is the least interesting part of the message in 2.09 "My Mother, the Fiend."
-marksoflove- Dog, Mr. Tapz
Bored inmate with a magic marker. Tapz's interior design skillz are about as doubtful as Aaron's innocence in 2.06 "Rat Saw God."
-grimsqueaker- Dohanic, Tommy "Lucky"
- Dolce & Gabbana
Fashion designers Domenico Dolce and Stefano Gabbana. Their clothes look good on the gorgeous Mrs. Casablancas in 2.03 "Cheatty Cheatty Bang Bang," and their
junior escortstudy buddy collection helps Scarlett Reyes concentrate when she's learning with Sully in 3.07 "Of Vice and Men."-grimsqueaker
All bios: 3.07 2.03- Doms
Name on a lock on a locker in autoshop. Um. That's it, really. There's not anything more to say. Further words would be superfluous. And possibly irritating. It could highlight the fact that the writers of the Who's Who bios often just can't think of anything witty or clever or funny to write — that we are creatively bankrupt. And that would be bad. Sometimes we can use something from the picture, but look at it! It's a lock on a locker in autoshop. Sometimes it's a matter of playing with the name, but Doms is sort of...just Doms. Although, thinking about it, it could be as in "Doms and Subs." Okay, now there's an angle. For those of you who need an education in extreme sexual practices—
Editor's note - No. Just no. We don't want to hear about it. And how the hell would you know anyway?
Well, there was this time...
Editor's note - You're so fired.
The locker in question, filled withpaddles and whipswhatever, shows up in 2.13 "Ain't No Magic Mountain High Enough."-Inigo- Don
News anchor. He shares the first name, though sadly not the screentime, of Sheriff Lamb, but no doubt he oversees the 5 Action News as capably as Lamb reigns his department. Don is neither seen nor heard in 2.15 "The Quick and the Wed."
-grimsqueaker- Don King
- See King, Don
- Sheriff Don Lamb
- Donald Orthenback
- See Orthenback, Donald
- Donald Fagan
- See Fagan, Donald
- Donald Trump
- See Trump, Donald
- Donaldson, Mrs.
Neptune High teacher. Supercilious and patronizing, she was in charge of the 2004/05 student council elections. The only thing more miraculous than Duncan winning the student council elections is that Ms. Dent didn't choke the bitch with that sweater oh-so-casually draped around her shoulders. Color us stunned in 1.06 "Return of the Kane."
-wyk
Played by Jane Lynch.- Donaldson, Mr.
Student with a business plan. Professor Corrigan approves of his ultra-high-concept and intricate business plan for...shoe storage? Wow, make that probably-thrown-together-at-the-last-minute and boring business plan. If this kid got an A and Logan got cut off of even presenting his business plan about, er, grading asses, Professor Corrigan is seriously the most boring man alive. Donaldson makes us snore in 3.17 "Debasement Tapes."
-funky-donut
Played by Kurt David Anderson.- Donnie Brasco
- See Brasco, Donnie
- Doogie Howser, M.D.
- See Howser M.D., Doogie
- doornewaardHans,
Email correspondent of Woody Goodman. doornewaardHans? What kind of weird username is doornewaardHans? Is this just a series of random letters that Rick typed to fill up the screen? Or is this another one of Rick's shoutouts to his VM buddies in 2.21 "Happy Go Lucky"?
-wyk- Dorata Pearl
- See Pearl, Dorata
- Doris
Not Mary Mooney. Trina Echolls confuses her biological mother with a character from The Simpsons, which is totally understandable. I do that constantly, right, Homer? An Alyson Hannigan character channels Cletus the Slack-Jawed Yokel for not the first time in 2.09 "My Mother, the Fiend."
-marksoflove- Doris Landers
- See Landers, Doris
- Dorothy Gale
- See Gale, Dorothy
- Doug
Weatherman at Channel 9 KTML and colleague of Martina Vasquez. According to the plug on Martina's webpage, Doug is on 24/7, which is a pretty impressive show of devotion to his craft. Maybe it's just a show of his devotion to the well-endowed anchor Martina, as displayed in 3.08 "Lord of the Pi's."
-Inigo- Corny "Douglas"
- Douglas
An astonishing car rental manager (he's employee of the month!), all Douglas wants is some serenity and maybe some peace of mind. What he gets is Stacy, who's no angel, for an employee. I bet he wishes he were a Next Top Model Slayer. Douglas jawohls in 2.06 "Rat Saw God." Firefly!
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Played by Joss Whedon.- Douglas, Alan
Father of Jackson. Which was more damning: that he was busted trying to buy an eight-ball from an undercover cop or that he was at an Eagles concert? His darkest secrets are revealed in 1.11 "Silence of the Lamb."
-Inigo- Douglas, Jackson
Neptune High student. He hires Veronica to find dirt on his strict parents. Maybe he should have spent that $50 on a decent haircut instead in 1.11 "Silence of the Lamb."
-Inigo
Played by Jared Hillman.- Douglas, Jocelyn Aardwick
Jackson's oh-so-perfect mother. Well, he thought so, until Veronica gives him the dirt: five speeding tickets and an accident, and all before she left high school. Tsk, tsk. Looks like Jackson might be able to get her to lighten up a little, in 1.11 "Silence of the Lamb."
-Inigo- Douglas, Ryan
President of Micardo Enterprises. If you phone the non-existing president of a fake firm designed to protect a skanky actor's secret alimony payments, and your call gets actually picked up, do you think whoever is on the other end of the line might be able to explain this part of the plot to us? Ryan bends the fabric of fiction in 3.04 "Charlie Don't Surf."
-grimsqueaker- Douglas Stern
- See Stern, Douglas
|
- Doyle, Bruno
Cute kid and son of a dead bus driver. He's crying and grieving and too young to know how horrible his life is going to be after Daddy wiped out half the participants of the Shark Field field trip. Sister Jessie shows him motherly love since his mother is a cow in 2.02 "Driver Ed."
-Inigo
Played by Michael Len.- Doyle, Ed
The driver of the bus that drove straight off a cliff, Ed was mourned only by his daughter and son. Unfortunately, only his daughter and Veronica think he didn't commit suicide, but was instead going to leave his wife for another woman. His last meal is discussed in 2.02 "Driver Ed."
-alliterator- Doyle, Jessie
Daughter of a dead bus driver. Jessie's hope of getting through high school under the radar is dashed when her father drives the school bus over a cliff. Self-preservation and love of her brother lead her to seek Veronica's help in clearing her father's name. Veronica refuses. Irritation and a fine right hook lead her to punch Shelby on the nose, with altogether more satisfactory results, in 2.02 "Driver Ed."
-Inigo
Played by Ari Graynor.- Doyle, Randi
Wife of Ed, mother of Jessie and Bruno, Randi seems to think that her husband isn't worthy of sympathy or tears. Whether it's because she thinks he commited suicide or he planned to leave her, we don't find out in 2.02 "Driver Ed."
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Played by Lisa Pedace.- Doyle, Suzy
One half of Veronica's failed match-making attempt in sixth grade. She only wanted Brad's love, but thanks to Veronica, she ended up hating his guts. Really, if you consider that Mac had to endure Butters' advances and Parker got traumatized by Mercer's
flirting techniquecologne, Suzy got off remarkably easy in 3.06 "Hi, Infidelity."-grimsqueaker- Tammy "Dragon" Retzinger
- See Retzinger, Tammy "Dragon"
- Drake, Mrs.
Mars Investigations client who asks Keith to hook up her hubby with a hooker. Why? Because she wants pictures of the chump humping the rump, in order to dump the prenup. Hey lady, Keith's a P.I. daddy, not a pimp daddy! Despite the inducement of a bonus, St. Keith is not interested in 1.17 "Kanes and Abel's."
-Inigo, wyk
Played by Lorelei Shellist.- Andrew "Drew" Barndale
- Drew Barrymore
- See Barrymore, Drew
- Drew, Carson
Man likely assisted by a a certain girl detective. Keith uses this clever alias to fool people who never read Carolyn Keene. Well, at least he didn't use the last name "Daly" in 3.12 "There's Got To Be A Morning After Pill."
-alliterator- Drew, Nancy
Famous teenage detective of books. Nancy Drew and Veronica Mars have much in common, being the daughters of single-parent fathers who indulge their penchant for solving crimes, although in Veronica's case, it's the family business. The resemblance ends there though, as Nancy never had to cope with being raped, losing her best friend to murder, or being ostracized. Nancy dressed in twin-sets and pearls; Veronica's got a mean line in bovver boots and spiky hair. In words that may well bite him on the ass one day, Logan dismisses Veronica's mad skillz in 1.05 "You Think You Know Somebody."
-Inigo- Drill Man
Fratboy on the Pi Sigma Sigma scoreboard. Given the subtlety of the Pi Sig Sig nicknames, we are sure this fraternity member either really wants to be in the army or he secretly dreams of being a maintenance worker. Drill Man is crafty in 2.16 "The Rapes of Graff."
-grimsqueaker- Drina
An object of affection. Who is Drina? Why is she loved? It's not Jessie, that's for sure. She is unloved and sad. It's a fair bet that Drina's dad didn't drive off a cliff. And by whom is Drina loved? Somebody who can write, sort of, in 2.02 "Driver Ed."
-Inigo- Driver
Of course, there are better ways to meet your favourite celebrities than hitting them head-on with a flower truck or obstructing their run from justice, but given what happened the last time Aaron Echolls got up close and personal with a fan, this guy isn't so much out of the ordinary. We wonder if he'll still get an autograph in 1.22 "Leave It to Beaver."
-grimsqueaker
Played by Dan McLellan.- Driver #2
Unintentional catalyst for adultery. This distracted yet polite Neptune driver may be reckless behind the wheel, but it's the seventh commandment that gets totaled after this driver careens into Keith's car in 3.06 "Hi, Infidelity."
-bethgee
Played by Brian Hatton.- Dru M.
- See M., Dru
- Drugstore Clerk
Disgruntled pharmacy clerk selling "Super Titan" condoms. With just the slightest hesitation and an irked glance or three, this woman accuses Logan of embellishing the size of Logan Junior and pegs Cindy "Mac" MackenzieMac[char] as a ditzy co-ed with a fuzzy moral code. Her judgmental glances do little to disrupt the fun of the gang's Valentine's Day Scavenger Hunt in 3.14 "Mars, Bars."
-bethgee
Played by Wendy Worthington.- Duane Anders
- See Anders, Duane
- The Dude
Stoner bowler who wears a bathrobe and drinks White Russians. It's difficult to capture the essence of The Dude in ten words, but...I just did. The Dude abides in 2.07 "Nobody Puts Baby in a Corner."
-Polter-Cow- Duder
Alternate name for The Dude, possibly when drinking beer. Veronica gets in touch with her inner Duder in 2.07 "Nobody Puts Baby in a Corner."
-Polter-Cow- Duff, Hilary
The albums. The movies. The feud over Aaron Carter. Ladies and gents, the snark just writes itself. Thank God the Duff is only mentioned but not seen in 1.03 "Meet John Smith."
-wyk- Duke, Luke
The Duke boy played by Tom Wopat. Generally considered the more cool-headed one, he said things like, "We're in trouble now, Bo" a lot. Inevitably gets framed by Boss Hogg, but it always works out in the end. If The Dukes of Hazzard was more like Veronica Mars, Bo would be the womanizing, videogame-playing older brother, while Luke would be the evil genius mastermind. Woody Goodman apparently fails to see the comparison in 2.22 "Not Pictured."
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- Dumass, Mr.
Trigger-happy father of Leslie. Okay, so it's all over the news that Terrence Cook was responsible for the bomb that crashed the bus that killed your daughter. So you find the man himself breaking into the house. Dude, did you really have to shoot him? You're the one who raised a blackmailing stalker! Sheesh. Dumass père is heard of but not seen in 2.15 "The Quick and the Wed."
-Inigo- Dumass, Leslie
Another short-lived journalism teacher. This America's Next Top Model winner might have hoped for better treatment than was dished out to stunt cast member Paris Hilton. If calling her dumbass wasn't enough of a clue, giving her the job which is fast becoming Neptune High's equivalent of Hogwart's Defense Against the Dark Arts position was a giveaway. Shoving her off a cliff was a bonus in 2.01 "Normal Is the Watchword.". Making Terrence Cook the victim of her blackmailing psycho stalker tendency (think Fatal Attraction) was a surprise in 2.13 "Ain't No Magic Mountain High Enough."
-Inigo
All bios: 2.13 2.01
Played by Naima Mora.- Duncan Kane
- Dunn, Mr.
Basketball player at Trevor Hale High School. Other than sharing the last name of Teddy Dunn and being good at his sport, we do not know what sets this Chicago kid apart, so Dunn remains a mystery in 2.11 "Donut Run."
-grimsqueaker- Dunne, Ms.
Teacher at Neptune High. She presides over a laboratory, but her empirical skills don't extend to knowing when she is being conned. Veronica gets an early release from class in 1.20 "M.A.D."
-Inigo- Dustin Hoffman
- See Hoffman, Dustin
- Duvall, Mr.
Columnist for the Chicago Statesman. He's a concerned citizen who writes columns about misogyny; maybe he should do something about getting his newspaper to change its name? Duvall takes back the night in 2.11 "Donut Run."
-marksoflove- Duverre, Tripp
Pi Sigma Sigma fratboy. If we go by his name, Tripp probably leads a secret double life as a French pornstar when not sizzling beer with his fellow PiSS brothers in 2.16 "The Rapes of Graff."
-grimsqueaker- Dweeb
A library patron. C'mon, Veronica! Help him find a book! I mean, if he needs help, it must be, like, a really important book that's gone missing or has been misshelved or something. It could be the Case of the Missing Library Book! Well, I guess macking with Logan trumps helping the Dweeb in 3.03 "Wichita Linebacker."
-alliterator
Played by Alex Pakzad.- Coach Dwight Fry
- See Fry, Coach Dwight
- Dylan Goran
- See Goran, Dylan