2.11 "Donut Run"
Aired Jan 25, 2006
Logan: Hi, ho.
Veronica: What did you say?
Logan: Oh, your uniform. Hi-ho, it's off to work you go.
Veronica: I guess that makes me Snow White.
Logan: You must be on your way up to see Mopey.
Veronica: How's he doing, Sleazy?
Logan: Old Italian ladies don't grieve like this. Boy, he must've really loved Meg.
Veronica: Well, then there's that other thing. You know, he can't see his baby.
Logan: A baby? How'd that happen?
Logan: There she goes, the angel of mercy. Time to fake the donut.
Logan: Uh oh. Did you catch him waxing his board?
Veronica: What are you doing here?
Kendall: I was invited. How 'bout you?
Kendall: Oh, quit standing there so smug. Tomorrow you're just gonna call me at two in the morning saying you want some company. For your information, that really doesn't satisfy me, Logan.
Logan: Really? You always come.
Dick: Logan told me what happened. You gotta let it go, Ronnie. Take a deep breath, let it go. If you're gonna date an heir to billions, the occasional afternoon quickie, you gotta let it slide. Cost of doing business, you know? Seriously, girls like Kendall, they let you do things that girls like you...well, let's just say you should be thankful. Vile stuff, you know. Really vile stuff.
Veronica: Move, Dick.
Dick: Just tryin' to be helpful.
Wallace: Oh, that's just pathetic. Up! Get up! I came over here to see Veronica Mars. Who's this...emo girl?
Veronica: Leave me alone, I'm wallowing.
Wallace: Not anymore. We're going out. We gotta go see a movie or get in a barfight or something.
Veronica: I don't wanna get in a barfight.
Wallace: Tough, 'cause you're goin' if I have to drag you. But, before we do, Veronica: shower. You smell bad.
Veronica: You're not helping. You think you're helping, but you're not.
Wallace: I bleed the gold and green. I'm a Pirate born, a Pirate bred. And when me die...
Veronica: A Pirate dead?
Veronica: If your Chicago high school hadn't their tryouts last year, you'd still be there.
Wallace: And if "if"s and "but"s were candy and nuts, we'd all have a Merry Christmas.
Veronica: What does that mean?
Wallace: No clue. Something my mom says.
Vinnie: Hey, Veronica! What's the haps?
Veronica: Oh, you know. I didn't think there'd be air conditioning, but, other than that, this is pretty much how I pictured Hell.
Celeste: I find comfort in knowing the child isn't yours.
Veronica: Let's hope she's got your smile.
Logan: Hey, listen, I need you to do me a favor.
Dick: It's not that favor Bobby Brown does for Whitney, is it?
Dick: Yeah, then whatev.
Dick: Oh, no, honey. Bad set, bad set. Don't make daddy hose you down.
Logan: You're not real complicated, are you, Dick?
Dick: Try not to be.
Veronica: Waiting for your girlfriend to make bail?
Vinnie: No, no, no. Her shift ends at five. I'm waiting for you, V-dog.
Veronica: What for?
Vinnie: I thought maybe you'd tell me where you're keeping Duncan, save us all some time, you know, earn some karma points.
Veronica: I have no idea where he is, and if I did, you would be the...last person I'd tell.
Vinnie: Am I hearing you right? Because you'd tell Osama bin Laden before you'd tell me? Because back in my day, we had a little thing called patriotism. Here, hold on, hold on, hold on. It's a negotiation, right? Okay, let's say I sweeten the pot. Let's make it...five thousand dollars, the karma points are yours to keep, and if you act now, I'll throw in a free set of steak knives.
Vinnie: Veronica. Seventy-two hours from now, I'm gonna have that kid back. And you'll wish you had those steak knives.
Logan: Hey, what's the word?
Dick: Well, the one they call Bootsy told me no and went on to suggest I perform sexual intercourse upon my own person.
Logan: Hm. Doesn't he understand? If you could do that, you'd never come to school.
Dick: Boy, that's the truth.
Logan: And Hector?
Dick: Sold me ten hits of E. Mint?
Logan: I gave you enough cash for twenty.
Dick: Hey, he gave me the 09er discount. Charged me double.
Morris: Now, Sheriff, I think we should make it clear right from the get-go that we are here to get that baby back. And we are willing to combine our resources—
Lamb: I'll share anything that you need.
Morris: —until such time as you piss us off. And when that time comes — and it usually comes quickly in Sleepyburg or World's Biggest Ball of Stringsville or wherever the hell we are this week — when that time comes, we will cut you out like you were a meter maid. You don't get the photo op, and you don't get the fruit basket. So repeat after me: Team. Me. Team. Come on, you can do it.
Morris: Great. So, why don't you get us up to speed with what you've been doing here?
Veronica: Is the sheriff around?
Officer: He's in with the FBI. You're Veronica Mars, aren't you?
Veronica: That's me.
Officer: Supposed to keep an eye on you.
Officer: You ever hit the clubs in L.A., Veronica?
Veronica: I'm eighteen.
Officer: Yeah, show me a club that'll care. I moonlight over at Club Thin.
Veronica: Club Thin?
Officer: I'm a bouncer.
Veronica: Well, I didn't think you were a cage dancer.
Lamb: Before we go in there, you should probably know something about Veronica Mars. We need to be careful with this one. She's...slippery.
Morris: Sheriff, we have interrogated Al Qaeda members at Gitmo. I think we can handle a teenage girl.
Veronica: Nick and Jessica. Is nothing sacred?
Morris: Whoa, Agent Wills, call for backup.
Wills: Just the chopper?
Veronica: Border patrol? Don't bother. Duncan hates Mexico.
Lamb: Is that so? Brer Rabbit?
Lamb: So. The FBI. I've thought about it, you know. But, uh, big fish, small town. Has its perks. Still, who knows, I still might apply.
Morris: You go to college?
Lamb: For a year. Blew out a knee at Southwest Texas playin' ball.
Morris: Speak a foreign language?
Lamb: A little Mexican. Enough to get by. Tell 'em to turn their music down.
Morris: Any expertise in computer science, law, physics, chemistry, forensics, mathematics?
Morris: Small town, big fish. You know, I'd ride with that.
Lamb: Duncan bookmarked a boat for sale. We tracked down the seller. Turns out, he sold it last week to a teenage boy who paid cash.
Veronica: I assume that's a generous use of the term "we"?
Lamb: I got a hundred bucks says he's headin' south. What do you think, Veronica? Wanna put your money where your mouth is? How much does your boyfriend hate Mexico, huh?
Veronica: Isn't gambling illegal?
Lamb: That's what I thought.
Veronica: Mornin', Sam.
Vinnie: Mornin', Ralph. Fritter?
Veronica: You should be out looking for Duncan.
Vinnie: Oh! Right. Duncan Kane. Ahaha. Ahhh! I got so swept up in your beauty I almost forgot my assignment.
Weevil: Oh, how the mighty have fallen. Do you remember last year, when you looked down on me like you were so much better?
Sean: Yeah. Did you get the impression something has changed?
Weevil: Well, yeah. It seems both our families are in the domestic staffing industry. That makes us like family. I steal cars, you sell drugs. Hey, I can hardly tell where you end and I begin.
Weevil: You know why The Reaper was called that?
Logan: He lost a bet?
Lamb: ¿Usted lo ha visto?
Motel Clerk: No. But you all look alike to me.
Keith: Sounds like they got you, honey. Well, think of the money we'll save on a prom dress. I'm gonna make a sandwich. Anyone want a sandwich?
Morris: You're cool, Mr. Mars. You're very cool. And you got a cool daughter. But kidnapping cases don't go away, you should know that.
Keith: Is that a no?
Vinnie: ¿Necisito un paseo?
Vinnie: Gas, grass, or ass, kid. Nobody rides for free.
Duncan: Thirty grand.
Vinnie: Pleasure doing business. Oooh, you pay better than your mom.