1.06 "Return of the Kane"

Aired Nov 02, 2004


  • Veronica: Why are you here?

    Lilly: Don't you watch any horror movies? My soul is doomed to walk the earth until justice has been served.

    Veronica: Really?

    Lilly: Yeah, that and, as kind of a side project, I dispense fashion advice.

  • Duncan: Please, Dad. All they do is sell candy and argue about prom decorations.

    Jake: Right, that's all they do now. Until the reign of Kane.

    Duncan: Oh dear God, may no one have just heard him say "reign of Kane."

  • Madison: You're not allowed delivery!

    Wanda: And you're not allowed to breathe my air. Go! Shoo! Return to Xanadu.

  • Madison: Pirate Points are earned by being a contributing member of the school. You get them for being in student council, for sports...

    Ms. Dent: Cheerleading?

    Madison: Is a sport.

  • Veronica: Why would he have wanted to kill you?

    Lilly: Honestly! I was awesome, right?

  • Ms. Dent: I was thinking maybe you'd be interested in covering the election for the student newspaper.

    Veronica: Sure. I'll write it up this afternoon.

    Ms. Dent: The election's tomorrow.

    Veronica: I can already see the headline: "Brown-nosing résumé packer wins in a landslide."

  • Duncan: Please, whatever you do, just don't vote for me.

    Logan: Did you hear that, folks? And he's humble to boot.

  • Wallace: For what possible reason do you have my student ID number memorized?

  • Veronica: I want to find out who this kid is and what art room he voted in.

    Wallace: Yeah, and I want a statue of myself in the main lobby, holding a musket and staring down danger. Since we're talking about stuff we want.

  • Veronica: Hi, Madison. I heard you lost your student aide gig and your student council spot. If I may be so bold as to make a recommendation: on Fridays...the sloppy Joes are your best bet.

  • Veronica: Finishing touches...

    Logan: "Duncan"?

    Lilly: Oh yeah, now that's just creepy.

  • Veronica: Why don't you come over tonight and we'll make new posters. I'll get some puffy paint and an Avril Lavigne CD and it'll be just like our pep squad days.

    Wanda: Awesome!

    Veronica: ...Okay, don't do that.

  • Veronica: Bravo, Logan! It's a new low. And just when the critics were having some doubts.

  • Veronica Voiceover: You'd think I'd quit being surprised at finding a knife in my back.

  • Clemmons: The sheriff's department has asked me —

    Veronica: I could just give you my locker combination, save us all a lot of trouble.

    Deputy Sacks: Nothing.

    Veronica: There's a couple of suckers...in the bag if you want one.

  • Veronica: I guess we're not going to that rave in the desert. But I do have a pretty good idea where you can stick these.

  • Veronica: You know what? No hard feelings. I didn't vote for you.

  • Veronica: I don't want things to be like this between us anymore.

    Keith: Like what?

    Veronica: Like our own game of Spy vs. Spy.

-persnicketier, misskiwi

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